So, I'm newly addicted to this clothing line from LuLaRoe. If you haven't heard of it, get on it. Their leggings are so soft and creamy that they make you want to just rub your legs all day, errday. Anyway - I was on a LuLaRoe board the other day, chattering about random things, and somehow birth control came up. I don't remember how or why, but it did.
Some girls talked about how their doctors stress IUD's, but personally, they freak me out. I have discussed that option with my doctor several times, and as much as she has recommended it, the risks outweigh the benefits for me. Lots of ladies opened up about their side effects from Depo: heavy or never-ending cycles, dizziness, anemia, significant weight gain, etc. I have not experienced any of those things; in fact, I don't have periods at all, which I think is pretty awesome.
It was only a matter of time before a lady with a holier-than-thou attitude chimed in with her thoughts on the matter. It's unlikely that she will read this blog at all, but I will keep her name out of it anyway. Her comment, verbatim: "Not ok nor normal to take a man-made chemical to stop the natural womanly cycle.....can't imagine what the doctors side effects pamphlet looks like for that."
I had to read it a couple times and let it sink in; she was the only person in the entire thread to be so incredibly judgmental, and that was also the only comment she made the entire time. She is clearly not one of those people to look at both sides of any equation, and probably didn't even think about all the women who don't even need a "man-made chemical" to stop their "natural womanly cycle." I could have responded in a number of ways, as I'm sure some of you could imagine, but I opted for something mild: "Well, I don't want kids. Ever. How many doctors do you know that will perform an elective tubal ligation on someone who has never borne a child?"
I have never discussed this option with my doctor, because the shot has worked so well for me, but now that Phil is here, and I'm growing tired of pumping myself full of hormones, it's moving to the forefront of my mind. The problem with it is that I haven't heard of or met a doctor that will perform an elective tubal ligation. I've been reading discussions and articles and forums, and it appears that the #1 explanation doctors give their patients for refusal of elective sterilization is, "you might regret it," or "you might change your mind." Now, I regret a lot of things in life. I regret my first marriage. I regret it when I drink too much because I forget I'm in my 30's now. I regret the pizza I had for dinner last night because I got heartburn from it (thank God for chocolate milk!) I don't want to regret getting pregnant.
After I wrote that, the wheels in my head began to turn. I wish I could get paid for thinking because that would make me a millionaire. Thoughts spiraled and bounced off one another in a number of directions. The discussion continued about how doctors are not willing to perform such a procedure, and one young lady made the most poignant comment of the day: "I'll take elective sterilization over women having abortions any day." Just sit on that for a minute. Wow. She's got a point, you know. Now, really, views on abortion are irrelevant here, and it's more complicated for me than a simple "for" or "against" anyway. This is about the juxtaposition of termination and prevention, and the taboo ideals surrounding both.
Women's rights groups fight for the Right to Choose. They fight for Planned Parenthood funding. They fight for affordable women's health. But is elective sterilization part of that fight? Why is pregnancy termination okay, but pregnancy prevention not? Why do I have the choice, the right, to terminate an active pregnancy, but I don't have the choice, the right to prevent any and all pregnancies without using hormones my whole life?
The more I thought about it, the more intrigued and perplexed I became: It's "okay" to choose to go and tell an abortion-performing doctor that I want to discard this living being inside of me, but it's not "okay" to choose to have a relatively simple, laparascopic procedure to responsibly remain child-free, because I might change my mind? Last time I checked, I was an adult at 18. I can vote, I can drink, I can serve on a jury, I can even still enlist in the military, but I'm not capable of deciding whether or not I want kids? For that matter, in the minute chance I would change my mind, there are so many unwanted, discarded children out in the world that are just yearning for a loving home.
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Here are some links to materials I read for this entry:
http://articles.chicagotribune.com/2014-05-13/health/ct-met-sterilization-denied-20140513_1_tubal-ligation-sterilization-young-women
http://www.alternet.org/story/57935/why_do_doctors_get_to_decide_when_a_woman_is_old_enough_to_have_her_'tubes_tied'
http://www.emedicinehealth.com/tubal_sterilization/article_em.htm
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